Parenthood Funny Moments Gifts

"Show Daddy what you learnt at Kung fu"

"I said, was... it... a... difficult... birth?"

"You got the dolls yesterday? My mom says I took nine months!"

"Two boys from legal to see you."

'She said her first words today.'

Chicken With Stroller

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

'Are you sure you didn't swallow your cell phone? I keep getting a dial tone.'

"For the love of God Billy, you've got to stop putting things up your nose!"

"Fasten your seat belt."

'There's been no stopping him since he said his first word this morning!'

Maternity ward (door sign.. push push).

Dad Dancing.

'The baby cut a tooth today.'

"It's a special place where they check the eyes in the back of their heads."

'I already have four girls. I picked out the names for this one. If I give birth to a girl...Jennifer. If it's a boy...hooray!'

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

"From now on, just pillage."

"Look. He's just created his first text output object."

Some blind dates work out just fine.

"I dunno. It just doesn't "feel" like a diaper."

'Look at big woosy Sid, pushing his pram with two hands!'

"It's too hot to strive for autonomy."

Where Box Turtles Come From

"Here's 15 cents. I assume you'll go into debt one day putting me through college, so this will take some of the guilt off my conscience."

'Look, Daddy! - Fluffy begat!'

Pram for Baby Giraffe.

"Listen, kid...I'm doing you a favor... Don't call here again for at least another 10 years."

'We mustn't frighten the new baby...'

'This is a worry. No dipstick to measure how much milk is left.'