Funny Parenting Moments Gifts

"Listen, kid...I'm doing you a favor... Don't call here again for at least another 10 years."

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

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:Come on sweetie, you know the rule: You need to finish your chocolate cake before you can have your carrots...'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

A man and his baby are wearing bibs with images of what they are eating.

Mother and Baby Hippopotamus.

"Guess who figured how to call 911!"

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

"She's a natural!"

"I'll bet she was worn out by the end of teacher's meeting day."

"Two boys from legal to see you."

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

"That's it young man. . . go to your room!"

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!" "I want to go back to work." "But my son is still so young. I'd have to send him to preschool or day care. And then most of my salary would go to pay for that. So what should I do?" "You should do what we did in my day: Have six more kids and then let them all fend for themselves!" "If your eldest isn't a strong leader, it may get a little 'Lord of the Flies'-ish, but that builds character!" "...in the survivors."

'Who says women don't like chase scenes?'

"It makes sense when you see the second painting with the lego."

Billy strip: help with homework.

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with a prostate!'

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

"It's from the children. They'd like us to let them in."

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

',,,But if I do eat them I'll lose my child support, Oh, Alice,divorce is so hard,'

"I didn't think you'd still be here at thirty."

"If you get to be a stay-at-home dad, why can't I be a stay-at-home daughter?"

'Are you sure you didn't swallow your cell phone? I keep getting a dial tone.'

Playing in the park....child on a leash.

"Fasten your seat belt."

Moma

'My daddy thinks you're really funny. He's always telling mommy about the clown he works for!'

'You've kept your shoes and socks on. I washed my feet yesterday.'