Parenting Moments Gifts

"Yes, mom, I forgot my towel. Now I need an exit strategy!"

'Baby's first two-step.'

'He licked all my tongue depressors.'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

Mother Duck.

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

'But, Mom, being good just doesn't work for me.'

"Oh well, if you really want to see some scary chest thumping, come with me now and I'll show my school report to my dad..."

"Oh, there will be an investigation!"

They Removed my Brain.

'I know how you like things to be clean, so I gave fishy a bath!"

"Your father dressed you, didn't he?"

'The baby cut a tooth today.'

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

Mum taking a picture of her child hiding behind a cello while the band are playing.

"No, son, there's no severance package."

"Yes, the French only eat the legs, but we're not French! We eat the whole frog!"

"Is it wrong that I miss the dog more than the kids?"

"Why is there a picture of an old man in the bathroom?"

"Show Daddy what you learnt at Kung fu"

"I dunno. It just doesn't "feel" like a diaper."

"It's too hot to strive for autonomy."

Site Safety: Minutes Since Last Accident.

"My kids are here for their appointment. Ages five and forty-two."

'Look, he's taking his first steps.'

"Look at that adorable mother and baby! I haven't changed a diaper in years."

"Here's 15 cents. I assume you'll go into debt one day putting me through college, so this will take some of the guilt off my conscience."

'My little boy broke my violin.'

Dear, I think Alayna needs to be burped again.

"Daddy has to clear his head for a few minutes before he can deal with 'Babar'."

'The air is thinner up here, isn't it Dad?'

'He came back home. Ran out of money.'

"Listen, kid...I'm doing you a favor... Don't call here again for at least another 10 years."

Again: Footballer takes selfie with dictator!