Parental Role Innovator Pillows

Breasts for the men

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

'Rock.' - 'Paper.' - 'Boris.'

Children in fancy dress on the way to music lessons

'Sharon's into genetic engineering!'

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

"How is it gendered?"

'The stuka brought you.'

Baby, baby maker

"Damn it, are we flying a spoonful of peas again?"

'You know, termite queens have over 100 million offspring. I mean, just saying...'

"You're just gaming down there? Shouldn't you be issuing your first IPO for some billion dollar internet enterprise you've created?"

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

'You can go home today, but we'd like to run a few more tests on your husband.'

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

"I'm a home-tech specialist. Your daughter called us. I'm here to convert her doll house into a smart doll house."

'It just says strange things happened after she ate the wafers. It doesn't mention their street value.'

'I'm not so sure I'm a problem child. Maybe you're a problem parent.'

'From what you describe, it looks like it's my dad who has the Maternal Instinct...'

"Look Daddy, at least the poor economy hasn't affected the Tooth Fairy yet!"

"Hi, it's me. My mum's confiscated my mobile." (Kid talks to friend using margarine tub and string).

"I couldn't find the off switch."

"We're still figuring out how to monetise him."

"Mom, there's a monster under my bed. Can we keep it?"

Bearded man with baby sheltered under his beard.

Designer Baby.

'Creative right?'

"Which one's mine?!"

Heimlich's Mother's Maneuvers

'You read him Jack and the Beanstalk again, didn't you?'

"I know I'm too young to drive. How about getting me a driverless car?"

'Let's play house. You be the stay-at-home dad, and I'll be the career mom.'

'I was well-informed, well-adjusted, a useful member of society - then I married.'

Child builds themselves a sled.