Parent Council Members Gifts

Ask Sadie Advice Hour. What's your problem?! I don't want to vaccinate my kids. But my husband does. What do I do? Excellent question. It reminds me of the time Mother Cohen and Father Cohen were arguing about vaccinating us kids. Father Cohen accused her of being a pawn of the Illuminati's attempt to use diphtheria to mutate us into ape-people. Mother Cohen accused him of being anti-Darwinian. That's when Father Cohen brought up her illicit fling with Chuck Darwin, and all heck broke loose. Um

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'Never underestimate the value of pipe-dreams, my son.'

Thunk! Teddy! Pick them up! They're toxic to all living things! Ok. Ok. But you don't have to exaggerate. Regrettably � I'm not.

Icarus, you are not flying anywhere until you put on some sunscreen.

'I wasn't playing hooky -- I was fleeing the deteriorating public school system.'

"It's all significantly less impressive once you realize these guys had free child care."

"You know, son, you're not going to get anywhere just gliding around all the time!"

"These safety goggles are sucking the fun out of the sandbox."

Warring parents

Soccer Moms

Mom's The Boss

"Stop telling me how well you did on the written."

"Your dad sure worries a lot."

'You look down, son. You wanna rock about it?'

The Supreme Court, Juvenile Divisio: "As usual, the obvious precedent for this case is the children v. Mommy."

'I may not be able to smack you, but it won't stop the 'Bogie Man' coming to get you if you are naughty !'

'Wow! Feel that kick! I'm buying him a football for his first birthday!'

"Oh, don't jump. But at least learn to code."

"Would you explain to your son that there's no free agency in T-ball?"

Never underestimate the power of parents in groups. Built by the Stonehenge Playground Committee.

My child was student of the month...But that was a long time ago.

"I've been a child psychologist for twenty years. Based on my experience, and several sessions with your son, I believe what is needed is a swift swat on his rump!"

'Principal Smith, this is a parent of a student in your school. I'd like to discuss my son's grades. Is this a good time?'

'Mom, we've hired a few people to fill in for you while you relax on Mother's Day.'

"By our estimates, it's going to take two villages to raise Joey."

"My Mom thinks I should clean my room. I'd like a second opinion."

"Can I can go to a party?"

"Don't sweat it. That's Little League—your dad comes, you choke."

'Arnold is a little nervous about meeting you, dad.'

'Your father kicked in the screen and threw the set out the window. He feels violence on TV is a bad influence.'

"It's my parents, for God's sake, Sid. Stand up straight!"

'Mom, I know all about the birds and the bees, it's the girls and the boys that bugs me.'

'Yes, you can go out, but remember, I can spot you from a long way away: You'd better behave!'

"I won't know the price until mom comes back from the market."