Paradise Planner Gifts

"Every day I'd sit at my desk and picture myself on a beach in Hawaii. So now that I'm here it just reminds me of the office."

"I wish we hadn't voted for this now"

"The brochure said escape to Tahiti, so here I am."

"We only got six days of funding."

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

When Engineers Crack.

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

"I think you might need to start again."

Innovation & Calculation

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."

There is no hurricane season in Aruba...

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

"Actually, I hear my boss. I'm on a working vacation."

"Don't blame me, you're the one who suggested an island-hopping holiday!"

"It looks brighter over there!"

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

"If we'd gone South for the winter, we'd be back by now."

Vacation Time: Hither, Thither, Yon.

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

'Now that hunting season is over, I'd suggest separate vacations.'

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

"I'm making a list of everything we have to do before we go away so we can freak out in some kind of order."

Engineer on the move.

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

"Oh goody! It's just like the Columbian Exposition of 1893."

"Every summer I regret having used up all my vacation days in January."