Peaceful Planner Gifts

"This year I'm really gonna get organized."

Concern Chart

His investment advisor gave him a new mantra.

"We only got six days of funding."

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

When Engineers Crack.

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

"I think you might need to start again."

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

Innovation & Calculation

Cindy's imaginary friend has the day off so the agency send over a temp to fill in.

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

Lawyer's secretary has in boxes labeled: Before the Fact and After the Fact.

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

Workers are running out of one door labeled 'Reactive Business Intelligence,' while another worker in the next room sits calmly behind a door with a sign that reads, 'Proactive Business Intelligence.'

Engineer on the move.

I don't do wishbones. I do just-make-it-happen bones.

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

A wiser and a better man

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

Bad Office Planning

Father Time Management

'First item on the agenda...Throw out the agenda!!'

'I see you've renamed your portfolios Moe, Larry and Curley.'

"We're still trying to sort out the details."

Clear construction agreements are important.

"I thought an illogical framework would work better."

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

'I can use surgery to restore your sex drive. Do you want the £3000 operation or the £4000 one?' - 'I'd rather have a new kitchen.'

"We can't go back to what we do best because that's obsolete now!"