Paperwork Gifts

Attention Span Remaining: 3 minutes, 27 seconds.

"Where would we BE without the right DOCUMENTATION...?"

"If you're really disciplined, you can get through all the paperwork in a 50 hour week..."

"We need to do something about excessive admin. I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

'Sure, we could make it simpler but that would only complicate matters.'

In one ear/Out the other.

"It drives me crazy when people complain about needless for filling...I mean if staff don't fill out the appropriate paperwork then how can we possibly know how much papaerwork has been completed."

"I can see you and I'm still too busy."

"I can't understand how it got lost - I haven't filed it yet"

"I'm applying for a grant to be able to apply for more grants."

Bureaucracy.

"I can assure you, he is somewhere in there looking for it."

"It drives me MAD when people act as though we've nothing to do except write moronic memorandum."

'Turn all this black and white into gray...'

'Take this report and put it into the form of a bumper sticker.'

"Fill out these 'new patient' forms, but leave 'age' blank, as you may age a year before you're done."

'This is the questionnaire we need everyone to fill out about their views on excessive bureaucracy.'

'You forgot the form number? No problem- Just fill out this form number request form.'

File Cabinets for Perfectionists

Forms I cannot deal with / Forms I will not deal with

"This IS the easy form. The regular one is over there!"

"Get a computer?! Do I look as though I have room in here for a computer?"

Dept, of the Hokey Pokey

Here and There Trays

In and out dustbins.

Man in office fencing with pieces of paper flying about

'I bet those are the accident reports.'

'New simple easy-to-use tax forms ... Leaves another taxpayer simple-minded.'

Al's Small Biz: 'Help wanted...someone to fill out government forms'

Regulators claim practices are overloaded with patient surveys.

"'Nurturing the sick and suffering', very interesting but first shall we look at how you manage forms ERT/3 through to HNF/56b."

"It's not my job to tell you whose job it is to tell you whose job it is to tell you what you want to know."

'Sir, to receive an application form, you have to fill out this application form.'

"The last of the paperwork harvest is in."

Anal Retentives Assoc.