Paperback Pursuer Gifts

"No, trashy paperbacks is the next but one..."

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

"I'd like to book 10 days going anywhere they've never heard of Brexit."

Hacking through ice in order to fish

'Are we there yet? Huh? Have we achieved Nirvana yet? Huh, have we?'

"I don't care what anybody says, coffee just tastes better in a tree stand. . ."

She required plenty of personal space.

Noise Pollution

'Yeah, the radiology job market is really hot right now - it's so hot I think I'm getting third degree burns! I gotta go!'

'As you go through life, always remember that money isn't everything...Health benefits and stock options are also very important.'

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"Once more, with fury."

'The Karma of the marketplace is about to overwhelm the Dogma of policy making,'

"It makes me happy that you took time to read the newspaper today."

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

'Be careful! She loves to curl up by the fire with a good author!'

The only creation God was truly proud of was the Sabbath

'Honey. . . I'm ommmmmmmmmmmmmmm.'

Truthfully, I'm just a frustrated insurance agent …

Ned's Northingness: All the Nothing You Need To Achieve Mindfulness

The idea of a wo-man cave was looking better and better.

Books On Paper

'Frankly I'm all meditated out.'

"The key to happiness is privacy. Hear what I'm sayin'?"

I'm trying to figure out what drives you... A new company car would be nice.

Ewe-topia - An imaginary perfect place where Ewes exist, their version of Utopia.

Great. What do I get the man who already HAS nothing? It's a birthday party.

'Bragging at the Old Physicists' & Old Writers' Home.'

'If I don't like it, I rearrange your face.'

"Behold my perfect window of existence, when I'm neither trying to wake up nor falling asleep."

"I thought it was a breakthrough, but it was only a misplace decimal."

Meditation: Do Not Disturb.

Working from Om