Purse Pursuer Gifts

'The results came back negative. You won't ‘just die' if you don't get that new designer handbag.'

'She hasn't advanced to figure eights yet.'

'Yeah, the radiology job market is really hot right now - it's so hot I think I'm getting third degree burns! I gotta go!'

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

'As you go through life, always remember that money isn't everything...Health benefits and stock options are also very important.'

"It was a scary few minutes but now I'm making a fortune as a motivation speaker."

'Bragging at the Old Physicists' & Old Writers' Home.'

'If I don't like it, I rearrange your face.'

I'm trying to figure out what drives you... A new company car would be nice.

'Nobody seems to bother me anymore since I won this.'

"I thought it was a breakthrough, but it was only a misplace decimal."

"Everest summit 1 km merge left"

Please use next mountain.

Mountain climber reaches summit and finds sign which reads: No ball games.

Dr. Fassbinder vanishes into thin air after failing to prove his existence.

CEO Incentives

"Yeah, I'll say that's a good head, now is there any chance you can put ome beer under it?"

"It shouldn't happen this way. I'll have to alter the data."

The Fledging Author Struggles To Find His Voice. . .

'..A new method of extracting money from purses.'

'This would be a lot easier, Miss Reed, if you didn't require such pinpoint accuracy.'

"We might as well go back, he says it's lonely at the top."

"It speaks to my desire to spend money."

'It's a social-climbing wall.'

"I wanted a job with a few perks."

"I decided against monogrammed initials for privacy reasons."

'Keep looking, nerd, keep looking.'

-Could you hurry please... I need it for the first race at Newmarket (at the bank loan desk).

1.999999

Chanel Bags at Dawn

Man Reaches Summit of Mountain And Discovers Ladder

"I've heard that men who venture in there can get lost forever."

"Your keys are in your purse? I think it will be quicker to call a locksmith!"

No table salt. - 'Right.' - 'Still no table salt.' - 'Okay.' - 'Table Salt!!!' - 'I wanted pepper.' -

City Permits Office. I've found you can fight City Hall, but it's cheaper to pay them to throw the fight.