Pandemic Relaxation Expert Gifts

"Nothin' like Olympic athletes to remind us all that a year of sporadic Zoom workouts ain't quite the achievement we thought it was."

Self help acupuncture

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

Lazy Octopus

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

My God, I need to fart.

Hey. Hey. Polly wants some folly.

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

'Say, our stress control seminar worked! Our sales are way down...but so what if they are.'

Yoga.

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

'He usually doesn't follow medical advice, but when the doctor told him to learn to relax...'

"Pillows for sleeping on are downstairs. These are all for screaming into."

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

Stop, Smell Roses (stop and smell the roses)

'After the tone, please leave your name and number.'

Ultra-lazy sloth

Problem Solving

"I'm thinking of starting my own range of 'inactive' wear."

"Would you like to sleep through the film or the variety show?"

'I call it laziness - He calls it stress management.'

"The parasol certainly paid for itself this summer."

Yoga To-Do

"I figured my stress ball should match the size of my anxiety."

'Hold on, Bob. I'm downshifting.'

Coffee

"This is perfect. I could stay like this for the next five seconds."

"Streaming"

'This is alphabet soup, Mom. I don't use the alphabet in the summer.'

'You know your problem, Harlan? You need to get in touch with your 'inner beach bum'.'

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'