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The Bored Impressionist

'They're great, but does your signature really have to include the 'D.D.S.'?'

Camille Pissarro

The artist

The Art Student.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'I WANTED to paint the room a shade of green, but gave up somewhere between chartreuse and citrine.'

Vincent Van Goat.

"I like it, honey ... it speaks to what a waste of time your MFA was."

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

'I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

I'm color blind, please help.

"I wouldn't mind, but I only topped the bloomin' thing up last week!"

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

Henri Matisse

"Harold finds painting very therapeutic."

"Ok, let's sneak up on Mr. Canvas and see if we can make a good impression."

''Midnight in Paris' didn't work in the conference room. Let's try something more vibrant like 'Sunrise Over Wall Street.''

Crayo-Blah

Jackson Pollock's early paint-by-numbers period.

Artists supplies: Fire Sale - Oil paints, burnt umber, burnt orange, fire red, hot pink.

Divine Intervention

'I don't see how this roller thing helps. . .'

Negotiations over the new colour scheme had reached stalemate.

Artist painting a picture of a pavement, "Y'know, being a pavement artist isn't all it is made out to be."

"Can we be seated under a vegan painting?"

Brick Red Paint...

Shadow Artist

Abstract Paintings.

"It's always Roy G. Biv this, Roy G. Biv that. Never Burnt Sienna!"

'But I've hardly got any brushes!'

Self-Portrait

'I didn't get a grant.'

'It's another canvasser dear'