Oversized Racket Enthusiast Gifts

"We've got a problem."

Pete Sampras

Monica Seles

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

Ratminton

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

The Predictable Demise of Sir Textalot.

'Take one of these diet pills every time you regain consciousness.'

"I hope you're good, Charlie. I've only played a couple of times."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

The Off-Season

I love tennis

A powerful tennis serve loosens the strings of a tennis racquet.

'Big advantage!!'

"...and how do you feel about being labelled the new Great British hope?"

Jack started to note how these 'accidents' always occurred after he missed a shot.

"Hmm, offhand, I'd say you have a nasty case of tennis elbow!"

'It's an old badminton injury.'

'Since Darwin said it's survival of the fittest, I thought I'd better take up an aerobic sport.'

"Now if he'll just swallow one more paddle we'll be set."

'Let's practice lobs again.'

'It had a happy ending... the guy loses the girl, but finds a good attorney.'

"Strategically speaking, your best move is to let him win."

'That's 12 games in a row. As my best friend, it wouldn't kill you to let me win one every once in awhile.'

'Wow, that's the worst case of tennis elbow I've seen this year!'

'for what we are about to receive...'

"Umm. . . Hello? I'm over here!"

'He wasn't too keen on you returning his serves.'

"If you killed him using a tennis racket, you need a sports lawyer."

"Yes! I got one over! Woo-hoo!"

'The swelling well receed in a few days and the racket should slide right off.'

Andre Agassi

Wordplay

Rafael Nadal