Oversharing Storyteller Gifts

Grandma's Cupcakes And Details About My Foot Surgery

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Swan Fairy Tales

J. R. R. Tolkien

The Demise of Tinkerbell

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

I wonder what kind of wizard or vampire my husband will be

My Spam Sketchbook

Wanna talk about it?

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

Santa's Helpers

Follow me on Twitter...

'I can't remember the title, but it began, 'Once upon a time'...'

Master of the Universe meets the sugar plumb fairies

Library. Story Hour. This fact-checking site says no cow has ever jumped over the moon.

'I'm sorry, but I can't let you on board unless there's a Mrs Bigfoot.'

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

"Mr. Swinehart has just crossed Route 36 at Goshen Junction. We are all expected, in exactly eighteen minutes, to greet him as he comes down the driveway."

'Just thirty-five years until I can run for office!'

Three years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadie™ show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she could deal with her midlife crisis. You should try a radical makeover. When I hit midlife, I dyed my hair, got some tattoos, and dropped 75 pounds. My husband barely recognized me when he returned from overseas. He was not happy with my "new self," so I divorced him rather than change who I'd become. It was the best decision I'd made since I cut my thieving mother out

"I'm going to read a statement and then I'll take questions.''

'Bridges falling down, killer pumpkin eaters...'

"Can I start you all off with my cheesy alimony saga?"

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

'Who needs a measuring tape when you've got an imagination?'

"I gave on the E train."

"Slow down. This stuff is gold, I’m tellin’ ya! Gold!"

Mommy and I are back from New Zealand. How was your trip? It was great. I got to see where the Hobbits lived. And there was green everywhere. Then we had to go. They wouldn't grant you and your mom refugee status? No. We tried Antarctica after that. We tried real hard to fit in. But the penguins just would not accept us as part of their society. Tell your mommy Trump's only going to be president for eight short years.

"Old Jack Frost nipping at your nose, eh?"