Overprotective Parents Pillows

"I realize some of your friends have them, but you cannot have a webcam in your room."

"I'm sorry your son Billy ran away, but there's not much we can do being that he's thirty-four."

"Did your mom commandeer your lunch account again?"

'I don't know if I like him hanging around with that chainsaw neighbor.'

'Do you think he's starting to out grow the pram?'

Why politicians shouldn't be allowed to have children.

No Immediate Danger

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

First Steps

'Honey...you're spoiling that child.'

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

Dating The Daughter Of A Hockey Goalie

License, registration, and some I.D. for the small child watching what appears to be a completely inappropriate PG-13 movie in the back.

"Ya know, boys and girls studying alone like this is strictly forbidden in Iran."

Personnel: 'I promised Mom I'd call her when I got here safely - do you mind?'

"My mom can be a little over-protective ... "

"No - wait, I haven't read them all yet..."

"Daddy, you're not going to give us a sermon on responsible behavior, are you?"

"Let's talk about your overprotective mother."

"Lawsuits must really be getting out of hand."

I wish my baby came with suction cups so there was a place to put him while I shower.

'Please excuse my mother, this is my first interview.'

Bring my daughter back at 11 sharp or...

They moved the bus stop further away. Ok. Where is it? "OK"?! They expect me to let my little babies walk 3 whole blocks! Umm

"I still think we should go higher than Factor 0.5."

'Your honor, we find the defendant not guilty, but we sure wouldn't let our daughters go out with him!'

My mom won't let me walk to school. I might get mugged. She won't let me play sports. I might get injured. West Fester High School. And she won't let me get onto the scales. Why not? It might hurt my self-esteem.

Parents dressing children in protective gear in order to play conkers.

"Jimmy has helicoptor parents."

"I asked my Mom to drive me to school because the bus doesn't have airbags"

"I kept dropping my phone and cracking the screen. So, my parents bought me a thicker cover."

'Dad - couldn't you miss just a little of my growing up?'

"Of course I trust your judgement dear. But, it can't hurt to do a quick police check on your new boyfriend."