Overprotective Antics Pillows

'The cows are home, the chickens at roost, your horse is in the barn, and I expect you home by 10 PM,'

No Immediate Danger

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

Mom, I think you're carrying us too much.

First Steps

'Honey...you're spoiling that child.'

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

License, registration, and some I.D. for the small child watching what appears to be a completely inappropriate PG-13 movie in the back.

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

"My mom can be a little over-protective ... "

'Which end's the shallow end?'

"No - wait, I haven't read them all yet..."

"Lawsuits must really be getting out of hand."

I wish my baby came with suction cups so there was a place to put him while I shower.

Health and Safety Gone Mad - "It doesn't look safe, his face is totally exposed to danger."

"Personally, I wouldn't have a problem with a nanny state."

Bring my daughter back at 11 sharp or...

My mom won't let me walk to school. I might get mugged. She won't let me play sports. I might get injured. West Fester High School. And she won't let me get onto the scales. Why not? It might hurt my self-esteem.

"I'm sorry your son Billy ran away, but there's not much we can do being that he's thirty-four."

'For cryin' out loud. All I said was I thought I heard a noise outside last night!'

'Oh, Daddy's old gun?... I think he's planning on showing it to you. He always said, it was there in case I ever brought a boyfriend home.'

"Of course I trust your judgement dear. But, it can't hurt to do a quick police check on your new boyfriend."

"Mom always was a helicopter mom, and now she's got a drone!"

'Darn it Mother! I'm not MISSING! I'm just working DOUBLES this month!'

'Dad - couldn't you miss just a little of my growing up?'

"Do your dad and tia know you broke up with Smiley?"

one final word. bring my daughter home at 11pm sharp or. . .

"Apparently, my mom knew I'd be bringing my phone to the beach. She put a floatie on it."

"Jimmy has helicoptor parents."

"I realize some of your friends have them, but you cannot have a webcam in your room."

"What is this? A note? Gracie must have dropped it..."

"I asked my Mom to drive me to school because the bus doesn't have airbags"

'Do you think he's starting to out grow the pram?'