Overcoming Addictions Gifts

Social Networking Anonymous 12 Step Program.

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

'He's finally done it - kicked breakfast TV!'

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

'This patch is to quit smoking...this patch is to quit drinking...this patch is to quit drugs...this patch is to quit coffee...and this patch is to quit having any kind of fun whatsover!'

"... ad that's when I got into the harder stuff, biscotti."

He was out in no time, with a new outlook and a clean slate.

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

"Just think of all the cigarettes I could have smoked."

"Apparently, he had occasional sober periods."

'Since he stopped smoking, he doesn't know what to do with his mouth.'

Thanks to hypnosis, he quit smoking cold-turkey. Everyone seemed real supportive until he came strutting into work, half-naked, gobbling incoherently.

'Now I understand why people want to give them up.'

Codependipity.

' I can't drink that..I'm a recovering alcoholic ! '

"Well, last year I kicked gambling. . . the odds are 3 to 1 the New Year will be a good one."

'I hope you can reform his addiction to computers!'

'You're meant to take off the old nicotine patches before putting on a new one!'

A man tries to avoid going over the waterfall of alcohol dependence.

Lab Rat Rehab...

"We need to break your addiction to prescription drugs. Let's see if this prescription helps."

'I remember when you were this high!'

"Refresh my memory-why do we meet once a week?"

"About time!"

"I'm glad you're trying to quit smoking Dr. Jekyll, but the withdrawal symptoms turn you into a completely different person!"

The trouble with trying to quit smoking.

"I put all this stuff on your credit card, Bob, but don't worry! I had a tarot card reading by Minerva and she said this is my lucky Bingo card!"

'My job is safe. This guy is a regular and he drinks to forget.'

'I'd like to quit drinking, but it's all I KNOW!'

Alcohol Problem Advisor - 'How do I mix a Bismark?'

"I want to see other hallucinations."

Turkey...cold turkey.

'Heroin chic isn't the look I'm going for. Do you have anything more rehab?'

"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, my AA sponsor walks into mine."

"He finally decided to quit smoking."