Outlaw Tales Fan Gifts

Ned Kelly's recurring nightmare.

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

"Sure, while you went out robbing folks I stayed here and made a nice quiche, and just to prove I'm not a sissy I made it with mountain lion instead of ham."

Dorothy, the lion, and the scarecrow, are suddenly confronted by the tin man of Oz.

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

"Once inside, the pawns will jump out and take them by surprise."

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

'Hey, I made a hole in Juan.'

"Watch yourself Sheriff....Looks like Billy the Kid is back in town!"

Circus trousers

'Isn't 'trolling' usually done in deep water on a boat?'

"This time it's curtains for you, Black Bart!"

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

"Watch yourself, stranger. I've got an itchy trigger finger."

Not at all O.K. Corral

"His teacher says he'll be as famous as Dick Turpin one day."

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

'Any gunslingers in your family? You're certainly 'Quick on the draw'.'

Bank (with saloon type doors)

'Brian hated his long legs and dinner parties'

'Amazing what you can do on photo-shop - that doesn't look anything like him!'

"Mr. Ringo alleges that Marshal Earp used a very unpleasant tone of voice when he ordered him outa town on the noon stage."

'You just grew three inches.'

"This is our adoptive son. We found him in the cellar where he was raised by spiders."

Billy the Kilt

Ned Kelly's (an Australian outlaw) continual problem.

In-law country

"I don't recognize the first two fellers, but I'm pretty sure the one on the right is the Hop-A-Long Kid."

Ain't No One Ever Messed With Cactus Arm Johnson

'Obedience school was just not for me: I ran away...'

'That's it, you've got it! I told you I could teach you how to hang by your tail!'