Outlaw Tales Fan Gifts

Ned Kelly's recurring nightmare.

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

"Sure, while you went out robbing folks I stayed here and made a nice quiche, and just to prove I'm not a sissy I made it with mountain lion instead of ham."

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

Dorothy, the lion, and the scarecrow, are suddenly confronted by the tin man of Oz.

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

"Watch yourself Sheriff....Looks like Billy the Kid is back in town!"

'Hey, I made a hole in Juan.'

"Once inside, the pawns will jump out and take them by surprise."

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

Circus trousers

"This time it's curtains for you, Black Bart!"

'Isn't 'trolling' usually done in deep water on a boat?'

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

"Watch yourself, stranger. I've got an itchy trigger finger."

Not at all O.K. Corral

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

'Any gunslingers in your family? You're certainly 'Quick on the draw'.'

"His teacher says he'll be as famous as Dick Turpin one day."

Bank (with saloon type doors)

'Brian hated his long legs and dinner parties'

"There it sat, still as night, in the bagging area ..."

'Amazing what you can do on photo-shop - that doesn't look anything like him!'

"This is our adoptive son. We found him in the cellar where he was raised by spiders."

'You just grew three inches.'

Willie Nelson's 80th Birthday.

Bad Guys INC. 'I got a cattle rustlin' requisition for ya, Slim.'

"Mr. Ringo alleges that Marshal Earp used a very unpleasant tone of voice when he ordered him outa town on the noon stage."

Billy the Kilt

Ned Kelly's (an Australian outlaw) continual problem.

In-law country

Ain't No One Ever Messed With Cactus Arm Johnson

"I don't recognize the first two fellers, but I'm pretty sure the one on the right is the Hop-A-Long Kid."

'That's it, you've got it! I told you I could teach you how to hang by your tail!'

'Obedience school was just not for me: I ran away...'