Osteoporosis Gifts

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

They hated me.

Remote control pirate bully

Showbiz Awards

Benedict Cumberbatch

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

Chase me, chase me cows.

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'They all want to play the star.'

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

'I play so hard that I have no time to work hard.'

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

'I was just playing rodeo and breaking horses.'

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

The Rooster Comedian.

"Tommy!"

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"What sorcery be this? Thine castle is bouncy!"

Television Readers.

A Guide to Balloon Animals

Champagne

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

Mittens is challenged by the string.

Boy rolled into a snowball

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne