Oral Hygiene Buff Pillows

'My dentist recommended it.'

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

'Hey, want to go to the beach ...I mean ...the birdbath?'

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

' ... and this is the half bath.'

Dentist's Office: 'I know that $3,280 hurt you more than it did me, Dad.'

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

Car wash / Mouth wash

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

"Yes, use an electric toothbrush but you still have to floss."

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

Floss Street Vendor

"Phew! Your breath. What have you been eating?"

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

"You always said nothing would ever come between us."

'I've got another loose tooth - It's not your cooking is it mum?'

'I'm so glad to hear that your teeth are falling out too, Manfred - I thought it was my mom's cooking!'

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

'I'm going to throw out my old toothbrush and get a new one.'

'You're not supposed to use 'dental floss' on dentures!'

"Ooh, you’ve got a little piece of retiree caught in your teeth."

"Damn these super powers!"

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

'I don't like the mediciney taste of this mouthwash either. I hate that taste of eyes of newt and turtle brains first thing in the morning.'

'That's my husband, Brad. He's a dentist.'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

Things you forgot to tell me about getting older: "You're going to need bigger tooth floss."

'Your tooth still sensitive to hot liquids my dear?'

Vernon has a Floss with Death