Oral Exams Gifts

Nervous Oral Testing

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

'Well, well, well...'

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

Hospital Departments

"All other letters have been disallowed."

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

Dentist's Office: 'I know that $3,280 hurt you more than it did me, Dad.'

You have the worst spring breath.

Medical Examinations.

'When are you going to admit you need glasses?'

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

Car wash / Mouth wash

NHS/Private Eye Care.

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

Floss Street Vendor

"Yes, use an electric toothbrush but you still have to floss."

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

"Phew! Your breath. What have you been eating?"

"You always said nothing would ever come between us."

'I've got another loose tooth - It's not your cooking is it mum?'

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

Investing 101 Acronym Test.

'I'm so glad to hear that your teeth are falling out too, Manfred - I thought it was my mom's cooking!'

"And if your teeth could hear you, Larry, what would you say to them?"

'That's my husband, Brad. He's a dentist.'

What goes up must come down, except for your cholesterol, apparently.

"Damn these super powers!"