Optimistic Job Seeker Gifts

'This is called waiting by the phone for months.'

Job Hunting.

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

Plan 'A', Plan 'B' - "I say we should go with plan 'A', sir."

Smiling Cake: Brave yet stupid pastry...smiled all the way to the small intestine

"It raises trust issues, Mr. Kranse, when your very first question is 'what's the catch?'."

"I'll put your application on file, Mr. Brandt, but I'm quite happy with my current paperweight."

"Things are looking up!"

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

"We were looking for somebody with experience in mumbo-jumbo but your resume is mainly about gobbledegook."

'Was my salary expectation a bit too high?'

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

Life is like a tube of toothpaste

"What sets you apart from other candidates?"

'Next time, Featherton, I'd like to see your sales projections without the clouds.'

'...we are looking for someone with great interpersonal communication skills.'

"It's always a good time to have a good time!"

When staffing agencies screw up.

"On your application it says you've been a circus clown, an orthopaedic surgeon and a molecular biologist."

"We do price loyalty, but we were also rather hoping for a candidate who could read right and walk on two legs."

'Staff Recommendations Inc.'

If only it was true...'I'm raising all your salaries by 50%...'

The globe vaults over Covid-19

'So far, so good -- I got a second interview!'

Hope of spring.

"Let's save some time, shall we?... Yes, no, for about five years, since I was a small boy, yes, I can start on Monday. Thanks, bye."

The Little Engine That Could pulls into the subway station.

'Thank goodness we invested in long term bonds.'

'Do you have any other references besides your mom and Santa Claus?'

"It pains me to do this, but you're hired."

'Shouldn't we also have a plan in case things go right?'

'You really should believe in yourself.'

Everything looks better through rose-tinted glasses.