Job Optimist Gifts

"Let's save some time, shall we?... Yes, no, for about five years, since I was a small boy, yes, I can start on Monday. Thanks, bye."

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"We need to do something about excessive admin. I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

'I had a thought. Let's scrap everything and start a new fiscal year right now.'

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

Upward Progress

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

"Gosh, I can't believe it's been over 25 years since our company was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the digital age!"

Six Thinking Hats

Trays on desk read: In/Out/Lose in the Shuffle.

"Sorry, we don't hire people with a history of whistle blowing."

"Since I am chairman, it behooves me to go first. 'What I Did Over My Summer Vacation,' by Wilson Rupert Hewes."

'Actually, my mom was the first to notice he'd lost that new boyfriend smell!'

'I want to see more blue sky thinking.'

'The good news is that from now on I belong to a very rare species. There aren't many personnel managers who create their own pink slip.'

"Despite years of management training john still found it difficult to give negative feedback."

Sign - CAN DO "I like your attitude, Harris."

"I'm surprised, Caswell. I thought you were a happy camper."

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

"I've got an office and I've got a window, but I wouldn't say I've got a window office."

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

"After viewing your current account balance, I think you should read the sign."

Doug reasoned that things could be worse...but just how much worse...he wasn't sure??

"Oh, don't mind us... We just want to make sure it's really dead."

'No good deed goes unpunished around here.'

Ahhh, spring baseball.

I accidentally deleted your report, Bob. Figures. Coffee maker's broken, Bob. Figures. Forget those changes I asked you to make, Bob. Figures. Bob, your flight is at 5 a.m. Figures. I need you to stay late, Bob. Figures. No, Bob, your plan doesn't cover dental. Figures. It wasn't exactly the six0figures job that Bob had hoped for.

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

Man replaces tank sign with deer sign

'-Must remember to empty that...'

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. That's a relief! How much can they expect out of your on your first day?

Nothing to Lose

Flower growing from a bomb.