Optimistic Forecasters Gifts

'We're projecting growth in the third year, but unfortunately, we'll be out of business by then.'

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

Protest

'I see you in five years from now, you're still coming to see me. Do you want me to book the appointments in advance?'

"Remember that optimistic, slightly crazy, throw a dart at the wall forecast? We beat it."

'Look at it this way ... one bad job can can give you all the experience you'll ever need.'

"What the hell happened to this town?"

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. That's a relief! How much can they expect out of your on your first day?

Great news! Scientists have cured many, many diseases! They've used new discoveries and innovative techniques to cure inherited liver disease

Never mind spring. What do you predict for the economy?

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

Tom's last day.

'Say, wasn't that the bluebird of happiness?'

"Well, this must be as big as I'm supposed to get."

Doom & Gloom

Research -Development - Wishful Thinking

"Someday a real rain will come and wash all the scum off the street. But today, expect occasional sprinkles."

'Congratulations on winning Weather Forecaster of the Year, you rotten swine!'

'On the contrary-I quite enjoy that Monday morning feeling!'

"There's no limit to what you can do with your life. Just look at me - I'm a chicken who ordered a beer."

'They did it again - not a word in the weather report about an ice age.'

Forecasters are two a penny. Supply exceeds demand.

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

Do-over

Weather bar

'To be honest, I don't think the garden does need it anymore.'

'Our market analysis is in.'

Let's talk about the weather.

"Someday, God willing, they'll bring the stars down to our eye level so we don't have to strain our necks."

World News for 2018

Uninhabital USA.

Masochistic Soccer Fan

Sports PsychologyBad at Sports Pscyhology.

"That's because supply exceeds demand."