Opinion Poll Aficionado Pillows

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

The pollsters turning up for the elections

Sir Winston Churchill

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

"Don't be sad, Bud. These decisions are so political."

That's What Happens

Barack Obama, Angela Merkel and David Cameron are ecstatic about the possibility of a free trade agreement between the U.S. and the European Union.

Joe Biden

Idlib, Syria - The final stage

John F. Kennedy

"And this will allow people the freedom to express themselves through the talking points of their choosing."

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

Annual Pollsters Convention. Wow, who could've predicted such a low turnout?

Steve Bannon Loves That Donald Trump Exists Outside Linear Time

The North Portico of the White House runs away crying.

Legalish

"We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts, but we want you to know that we tore yours into tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page."

Hostage Crisis Continues: 'We don't care what the people voted for! We want out way!'

Opinion Dislodgement Disorder (ODD).

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

Eye Off the Ball

Gladstone returning to Westminster without a new ticket

Caricatures of Political Figures Exhibited at the Opera Ball

"Sir, your new campaign manager is here."

'We should e-mail this and point out that many of our victims were in key marginals...'

Martin Luther King and Obama.

Today, tech stocks rose on news the latest gadgets avoided internet censorship by the Iranian government.'

William Pitt the Elder

'I know zero about the issue, so I can't be called a 'Washington insider'.'

New GOP Election Laws: "Look at it this way. . . we're making it easier for you to climb that tree...!"