Opinion Poll Addict Pillows

SMACKATORY

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

'Why does my opponent keep lying about me?', 'Because truth is stranger than fiction?'

"Oh my God, they're gassing refugees. Look at this family!"

'The candidates campaign promises have been re-named campaign ideas to avoid lawsuits.'

'Please, Ma'am — I'm running out of paper!'

Crooked Hillary... Pig... Sad!... Not a Ten!...

"And I thought I was toxic. . ."

Desk of Public Opinion Polls has 'In' box 'Out' box and 'Undecided'.

"? ???????? ?????, ??? ???????? ? Waukesha County."

The end of election 2016

Pollster

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

EU Deal

"To sum up the political platforms of the candidates....Trump wants to put Hillary in prison, and Hillary wants Trump on the sexual predator list."

'I'm afraid we can't make it. Harry just finished watching Meet the Press, C-Span, Face the Nation, Fox News Sunday, the Sunday Times, Newsweek, Time...'

"This is gonna be great!"

'Remember your blood pressure, dear!...the Dr, warned about anything that would anger you, like this divided congress and their inability to compromise on things beneficial to the nation.'

Vladimir Putin as Uncle Sam

"Here's my idea. . . we offer Trump the Nobel Peace Prize as a quid pro quo for leaving office."

"I'll check your circulation."

'You think economic news on TV could be adversely affecting our patient?'

'Yes. No. Sometimes. No. No. Yes. Don't know. Sometimes. Yes. Mo.'

election polling

Impeachment to Trump

"This internet survey is asking me to take another survey rating the survey I'm taking."

'It's true that I accepted the bribe, seduced the intern, and stole the money, but I did it with the nation's best interests in mind.'

Trump-Putin Conspiracy Theories