Ophthalmology Observer Gifts

"Miss Jones, get up here and change this eye chart, please!"

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

'He's been like this ever since he had his laser eye treatment.'

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

He used to pass the buck, since being promoted to management he gets to call it delegating authority.

'Chicken Farms - Pecking Order'

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

"I'm afraid you have a condition called 'googly-eyes'."

'I miss telling people they can't have a day off to be with their sick children!'

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

'No, I'm sorry, Danny. I'm afraid your dad won't be able to shoot laser beams from his eyes after surgery.'

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

Pirate eye test

'Despite his laser eye surgery, he still doesn't see the mess he leaves in the living room every day.'

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'Whatever it is, you've got it bad and that ain't good.'

Hospital Departments

'They're right.polorized sunglasses do help you see better underwater.'

"All other letters have been disallowed."

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'Wait! Wait a minute! Would you hold my glasses?'

'...better or worse...better or worse...better or worse...'

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

'Have you tried removing the blindfold?'

"What we need in this organisation is more personal contact."

'When are you going to admit you need glasses?'

NHS/Private Eye Care.

'He wasn't doing a bit good, until I changed his glasses.'

'It's Blurred.'

'How dare they make these kind of suggestions?!'

'Aha! I think I figured out the headache problem, one of these things is pointed the other way. This would explain the double vision.'

'I suppose it was a blessing. Toward the end he was finding it very difficult to remain competitive.'