Ophidiophobia Sufferers' Support Groups Gifts

'Don't worry, Bill is not a snake: He's a legless lizard...'

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

Dog Nightmares

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

"What do you mean you can't stand to be touched?"

"Pencil eraser."

"Mr. Carley, would you like to begin today’s session?" "Claustrophobic's therapy session today at 2:00"

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

What's Their Secret?

I'm afraid of Chia Pets, doctor. Actually, Al, so am I. Either you're getting well, or I'm going nuts.

I just can't understand Ho9w anyone could be afraid of clowns.

"No, not us. Do something every day that scares you."

Doc, I've got a phobia about shadows.

"I wish I had known you have arachnophobia before I paid."

Death By Mattress

I riry hay oey oo ah eh-eh! We'll never cure your fear of dentists if you keep talking like that.

Therapy Group For Those Who Are Afraid of Therapy Groups

"It's like every year my fear gets a little worse."

'Tell me again why we are afraid of chairs.'

'For claustrophobia. Take two tablets right before hiding under the bed.'

'Do you still think my fear of Scottish clowns is irrational?'

"They've always scared the hell out of me."

Bridegroom jumps in the hands of his bride after seeing a mouse

"No, a fear of snakes is not unusual, but in your case..."

"You think you've been kicked-around a lot? Try being me for a day..."

Breathe-aholics Anonymous: 'Hi, my name is Glen, and I've been clean and sober for over one minute.'

'Another nightmare, Billy? What genre - horror or thriller?'

'Boy I freak out when slimy things touch my feet...'

Danger! Snake heaven.

Psychiatry. It's funny. You're a germaphobe and the last patient on that couch has a phobia about soap!

Customer: 'I'm looking for books to help me overcome my fear of mice and snakes.' Clerk: 'Oh. Eeeee-Books?'

On Display At The Children's House Of Horrors

'I wish you had come in to see me sooner, before your phobia had started running wild.'

"There was a bee."

"My name is Pennywise. My preferred pronoun is 'It.'"