Operation Buff Pillows

Brain surgery sneeze - 'Gesundheit...!'

Gall Stones.

Champagne

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

'John is watching the game under protest.'

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Presenter Auditions.

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

Don Pasquale

"Welcome to 'All About the Media,' where members of the media discuss the role of the media in media coverage of the media."

'On a personal note, I'm pleased to report I've been upgraded from reporter to opinionated loudmouthed pundit.'

'Fred, with the market off over 500 points, we thought we might modify your call-in program today.'

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"Well, that's show business."

'This is just a thought, but maybe we could try animated anchormen.'

"A survey found 82% of people think surveys are a waste of time."

"If PBS announcers did football games." "Let's listen carefully to the quarterback as he scans his options. It appears that the defense seems to want to deter his team from moving the ball forward..." "The fans are making so much noise. I wonder if they know how hard that makes it for the players to concentrate?"

'If the following program sounds silly, it's because it's a a paid political announcement....'

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

'Day is day and night is night. That's the opinion of the management of this station. Here with a rebuttal, is attorney...'

The passing of a radio/tv personality.

If I survive this, I'm reinventing myself as a television pundit.

"They want to see more snow on your hat next time. . . ."

Obtaining a degree in TV Broadcasting.

"Are you feeling okay, Dennis? Your obituary is in the paper."

'You're going to stitch me up in this interview aren't you?'

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...