Operation Buff Gifts

Brain surgery sneeze - 'Gesundheit...!'

Gall Stones.

Champagne

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

'John is watching the game under protest.'

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Presenter Auditions.

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

'On a personal note, I'm pleased to report I've been upgraded from reporter to opinionated loudmouthed pundit.'

Don Pasquale

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

'Fred, with the market off over 500 points, we thought we might modify your call-in program today.'

"Welcome to 'All About the Media,' where members of the media discuss the role of the media in media coverage of the media."

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"Well, that's show business."

'This is just a thought, but maybe we could try animated anchormen.'

"Are you feeling okay, Dennis? Your obituary is in the paper."

"A survey found 82% of people think surveys are a waste of time."

"If PBS announcers did football games." "Let's listen carefully to the quarterback as he scans his options. It appears that the defense seems to want to deter his team from moving the ball forward..." "The fans are making so much noise. I wonder if they know how hard that makes it for the players to concentrate?"

'Day is day and night is night. That's the opinion of the management of this station. Here with a rebuttal, is attorney...'

Obtaining a degree in TV Broadcasting.

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

The passing of a radio/tv personality.

"They want to see more snow on your hat next time. . . ."

'If the following program sounds silly, it's because it's a a paid political announcement....'

'You're going to stitch me up in this interview aren't you?'

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

"Ah, summertime! Robert Potts is sitting in for Jim Jensen, who is sitting in for Harry Reasoner, who is sitting in for Walter Cronkite, who is on vacation."