Operating Room Gifts

"You're doing it wrong."

"You know that feeling when you walk into a room and can't remember why you're there..."

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

"Damn it, nurse! I didn't ask for a twenty. I asked for a ten and two fives."

'These computer repair people certainly take their jobs seriously.'

'In the doctor's defense, there have been no serious post operative complications.'

'You'll be awake during the entire procedure...but no peeking!'

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

"If this isn't successful, the next one is on us."

Say, aren't you my old shop teacher who said I couldn't cut a straight line to save my life?

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

'My patient needs a new kidney. Make any grave mistakes today?'

"Good?"

Surgeon Finds Heart Reading 'Be my Valentine'.

"I'm Dr. Fenton. I'll be performing your microsurgery today."

'I need to reset his internal clock...does anyone have the correct time?'

Nurse cautioning a patient

Surgery / Canteen - The perplexities of priorites.

'Where's the first-aid kit?'

"Oh, here's the problem. He's got a doohickey on his thingamabob."

'Doctor, I don't think the five-second rule applies to transplant organs.'

"I can catch-you can't throw."

'You're wrong...this is brain surgery.'

The Grim Reaper as a surgical assistant.

Operating table.

'So then the linebacker yells back at this guy: 'Oh yeah? Well, next play, I'm gonna cram the ball...' Wait! I got it.'

"Hold it. I'd like a second opinion!"

A heart flies out during an operation.

"Curl your fingers to avoid cuts when slicing or chopping...I learned that trick on a TV cooking show!"

'Forgive the interruption, but can the surgeon wait until after he operates on me to play his chess.'

"Okay go ahead, but I say the appendix is on the right."