Operating Room Techno Gifts

Wow, is that the new lithotripter? No, it's the new Dolby surround sound system, with extra-tech woofers.

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

"Sorry, that's not my table."

"Damn it, nurse! I didn't ask for a twenty. I asked for a ten and two fives."

'These computer repair people certainly take their jobs seriously.'

'In the doctor's defense, there have been no serious post operative complications.'

'You'll be awake during the entire procedure...but no peeking!'

"If this isn't successful, the next one is on us."

"I think you may have your gown on back to front."

"And it'll stay clamped until you play my Usher CD."

Say, aren't you my old shop teacher who said I couldn't cut a straight line to save my life?

Quick! 5-second rule!

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

'My patient needs a new kidney. Make any grave mistakes today?'

"Good?"

"I'm Dr. Fenton. I'll be performing your microsurgery today."

Surgeon Finds Heart Reading 'Be my Valentine'.

'I need to reset his internal clock...does anyone have the correct time?'

An aspiring magician as well as a top notch surgeon, Dr.Curmbott always tried the old tablecloth trick after each operation.'

Surgery / Canteen - The perplexities of priorites.

Nurse cautioning a patient

'Where's the first-aid kit?'

"Oh, here's the problem. He's got a doohickey on his thingamabob."

'Doctor, I don't think the five-second rule applies to transplant organs.'

"Oh. I know what that organ is! Wait, don't tell me."

'You're wrong...this is brain surgery.'

"I can catch-you can't throw."

"You know that feeling when you walk into a room and can't remember why you're there..."

Darn, there's always one piece leftover that doesn't fit anywhere.

Operating table.

"Curl your fingers to avoid cuts when slicing or chopping...I learned that trick on a TV cooking show!"

A heart flies out during an operation.

"Hold it. I'd like a second opinion!"

Wait a minute