Online Streaming Gifts

While watching Mass at home during the pandemic, dad gets the bright idea of taking up a collection.

"Well, he looks alive as of 10 minutes ago, but the stream is frozen."

'Are you going to stay up all night making YouTuba videos?'

"We had 17 first time viewers on the live stream sermon today." (pastor talking to his wife)

Now Playing On Your Phone: Other People's Craft Projects....

"Sixty three percent of my life is on video."

You're on in five! Got it! Okay, Ernie! This is the biggest crowd we've ever played for! I can't wait to greet the audience! Hello Chicago! And London, San Antonio, Rochester, Greenville, Columbus, Sao Paulo, Ogden, San Jose, Seattle, Grand Rapics, Washington, DC, Las Vegas, Santa Ana, Terre .... Remote shows.

Football prayers.

'I can't afford dinner and a movie, but I brought a hamburger and a YouTube URL.'

"Baldo, can you go to the store with me?"

"He's so needy. He binge watches his YouTube LIKES."

Melvin's life flashed before his eyes after a brief internet ad.

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

Cord cutter

'There's nothing on.'

TV-Man

Dawing your Cellphone

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

I should probably get out more.

The First Fire Stick

Live Stream

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"The video of you eating my $700 John Varvatos got 300 'likes.'"

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"You are still here."

Zoom Christmas

"Press catch up, and find out what we just slept through."

"We're not really fighting, mom. We just need a little drama for our YouTube channel. Subscribers equal money."

Binge Watch

"Kevin, I'm leaving you to find myself ... a better Internet connection."

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"