Online Romance Explorer Pillows

Noah's Ark: "It worked for the others."

"So, uh, your profile said you oil... what's that all about?"

Computer Dating Service: Be Careful What You Wish For!

"I hear 'mysterious' when you call me creepy."

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

'My understanding of psychiatry is that women fantasiss and men internalise - in fact I'd like to internalise right now.'

"Why don't you find a museum!"

"I feel we haven't moved beyond parallel play."

Tunnel of Love/Tunnel of Marriage

'When we first met there was a chemistry between us. These days though, it's more of a 'chemistry set'.'

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

Online Dating

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

'Trust me, she can't fail to notice you now...'

"This is just SO like him. For years, I begged him to straighten up and fly right, and when he finally DID, it was right into a picture window!"

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"I feel like I don’t even know my own husband ... and it’s driving me wild!"

'The way we met was interesting. I opened my wallet and there she was!'

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

Heart to heart talk.

'We need to talk about your fear of commitment, Ralph.'

"Frank, I want you to try antidepressants."

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

"Arthur, I need my space."

"Why can’t this count as ‘date night’?"

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

"She said, 'I'll go if you go,' and I said, 'I'll go if you go,' and here we are."

"This sounds promising. . . dark brown hair, loyal, cuddly and good in bed."

Waterfall of Disappointment

"Your grandma and I have decided to live together."

"I was surprised myself, but living apart, seeing other people, and having virtually nothing to do with each other actually has made our marriage stronger."