Online Posting Gifts

You did what? I posted your last will and testament on all the social networks. Now everyone knows you left your feminine hygiene products to the Smithsonian. Why would you do that you @#$%^?! Ugly picture taken. Posting to Facebook … now. Well-played, cretin.

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

Right click for yes...

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

Updated Classis: Alice Through the You Tube.

"We met through the personals. We both were seeking someone 'Rubenesque'."

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

"You may now kiss the bride."

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

INTERNET MARRIAGE.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

Today's love

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

cuPad

'Your website or mine?'

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

Dating - "Oh, and she must have a sense of humour."

"Everybody meets online these days."

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'

"It must have been fate that brought us together."

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

"Your online profile says you like to foxtrot."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"Our online romance needs fresh start. I think it's time to hit 'ctrl', 'alt', 'delete'."