Online Gaming Champ Pillows

"This is the night Marvin gets together with his online poker gang."

What an afternoon. Rudy, listen to me. It didn't mean anything. You can't play Xbox 360 all afternoon with a guy and pretend it means nothing. I was drunk! You loved it - all of it. The racing and arcade games, the first-person shooters, but especially ... No ... WWF Wrestling Smackdown. I'm a married woman!

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

Board Game Hunter

"I'm recommending more video games. I'm worried about his hand eye coordination."

"It's got my current Wordle winning streak on it."

Funky Facts - UK kids.

Come to bed, Snookums. In a minute. Are you still playing Scrabble? And flaming my opponents. I just crushed an eight-year-old by 100 points and then told him his parents don't love him because he's illiterate! How nice you've found a hobby. I feel so nurtured.

We have your internet connection.

'Your mother and I are worried that all these video games might be having an effect on you.'

Another entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Pixel sprain - any physical injury incurred from intense video game play.

Net Bubbie

"Going out to play? Get back to the computer and start e.gaming!"

'Queen you? There's no queen in checkers, and never has been or will be.'

"Just so you know, despite the horrifying beating you're about to receive, I'm actually a pretty good hockey player."

'I name this child 'Blumming Nuisance'.'

'Let's switch sides. My feet are killing me.'

'Then it's settled. She gets the house, he gets the cars and the video games go to the winner of a game of 'Guitar Hero'.'

'Close the chat room and start your homework or I'll pull the plug and switch you to America Off-line.'

'The games console has saved us a fortune in holidays. We told him we were seeing the pyramids but we were actually in Skegness. He didn't notice.'

I worry that your camp concentrates too much on soccer. I'm ok, mom. Really. Specializing is bad for your joints and muscles. Chill, mom. I'm cross-training. Oh. I have very well-conditioned thumbs.

"Stop pouting, Randy. You've survived other Internet outages before."

I'm going to sports camp this summer. Same. Tap tap tap. My parents think it'll help me make varsity. That'll get me into college. Same. Tap tap tap tap tap. Got him! Nice move. Too bad we can't letter in video games.

March of the Zoombies.

How come you never take any of my ideas seriously? I'm a marketing genius. I have a long track record of attracting business in both the residential and commercial sectors. What? When? Where? I've generated hundreds of billions of simoleans in the last 24 years. Wait ... Are you taking about Sim City"? Everything I touch turns to solid gold!

'The genius is that WiFi only stays on for seconds at a time.'

Bring it on, Scrabble nerd! Want to tell him directly? What do you mean? There's a chat function so you can taunt other online Scrabble players. Just type in your insult and hit send. Have I died and gone to heaven? The internet. And I suspect it's met its match.

'Guess Who Just Got A Hole in One?'

'This is my second Life alter ego Brian the Accountant.'

"Good morning 'Best Friends Forever' breakfast club!"

"Baldo, when's the last time you read a book?"

'On the other hand, he's very good at Chinese Checkers.'

'Dinnertime!', 'Not now, Mom -- the fate of the Galaxy is in my hands!'

'Alright, who detonated the thermonuclear paintball bomb?'

'This is fun, Dad -- I'm in a flame war with Vladimir Putin!'