Online Debaters Pillows

Read this first! You might like these! Stupid book. Loser. The Internet Library.

The Proust of Twitter

Changing Minds

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

My new laptop is nicer than your new laptop. I'm not going to get into a competition about whose new laptop is nicer. The one I replaced is nicer than the one you replaced. Stop it.

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

"We broke up. I wanted a proprietary platform - she wanted open source."

"I had a great weekend... My Grandpa talked about the war again and my Dad about his most daring facebook comments!"

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."

Blog Breakdown

'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'

I can't keep up, Randy. What happened, little buddy? You know how I created a hate-bot to automate my back you up in online arguments business? Don't tell me: The Russian troll farms beat you to it. No. My hate-bot became sentient and created an even snarkier hate-bot. Mankind is officially obsolete. For an extra $1, the HB-1000 will throw in racism and misogyny.

Too many people post comments in the heat of anger. They strike while the ire is hot!

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

The First Asshole

"Not now, honey. Daddy's arguing with strangers about the sexual orientation of puppets."

"Sorry, Man! I had no idea Alexa would be here!"

"I know you're wrong, I just can't get the computer to say it yet."

"How's your lowrider blog going?"

"I learned my social skills on social media. . . what's it to you anyway you stupid cow?!"

"I can tell you about this article or you can just read the comments online."

Philosophie.fr Bulletin Board - 1936

To tweet, or not to tweet - that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the snark and the venomous replies of anonymous jerks

Unsocial Networking.

"Thank you for participating in this poll, but because your answers do not coincide with your social media rantings, you're obviously lying."

"Whatever the politicians might decide, I'm well prepared because I've got enough hate comments for the next five years!"

Maybe Those Bots Can Be Used for Good

Rudy, be reasonable. We can't have a functioning media if everyone starts putting up their own stories on the web. We need professional ethics. We need editing. We need fact-checking. We need

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."

"Hmm... I wonder what I can find to trigger my self-righteous indignation today..?"

'Don't internalise that simmering rage -- get it out of your system on website comments sections.'

Oh no! What's wrong? I tweeted a sarcastic insult about Brian Blount, my nemesis in the race for class president. So? So … the sarcasm didn't come through. All my followers think I was praising him. Oh. Yeah, well sarcasm's tricky online. Oh no! My followers are confused about where my loyalties lie. Oh no! Some of them are calling me a sellout. They're saying they're disillusioned! Oh no! Now they've split into two factions, those who say I'm a sellout and those who say maybe Brian Blount isn't

Every man and his dog gets to have an opinion on social media.

"They're powered by Internet outrage."

"It's the first law of social media."