Old West Humor Fans Pillows

"Looks like our spittoon has been hacked."

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"Reach for the sky, stranger."

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

The modern sheriff.

"They say it's the last of the really big cattle drives, and I'm just glad I'm here to see it."

Cattlemans Saloon.

"Trepanning for gold"

"Giddyup."

Reality Wagon Train

"Lost his first hat about nine months ago. Really tore him up too."

"There's trouble, boys. Let's pants up and move out!"

'Yesterday he was a kingpin, but today he's just a lynchpin.'

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"

Early American Think Tank.

'It's what we were afraid of, Virgil. Someone's selling guns to the Indians.'

"Just a minute - I'm uploading."

TV Guide: Cowboy Cowboys.

"I can't right now. My spurs are stuck together."

'I must warn you, I'm the fastest gun west of the Rie Grande.' 'WOW! Unfortunately, we're five miles east of the Rio Grande.'

"Nope, Jeb's my pardner. My partner is Zeke."

"Yes, I can help you with your loan questions. I'm the loan arranger."

'Uh, yeah, you go ahead. We'll catch up with the wagon train later.'

"And don't ever try to use your smartphone during trivia night again!"

"Where did this thing come from? It's a major trip hazard if you ask me!"

Cat cowboy says: 'That ain't no tumbleweed, it's a hairball.'

The Gun that made the West feel good about itself

'These new bendy wagons will be handy when pulling em into a circle.'

Dang prairie dogs!

"Take this, Luke. They say it's impossible to get a decent baguette west of the Pecos."