Old Testament Explorer Gifts

"Psst...quick -- check how long a Bible guy named Methuselah lived."

Physician tending a mummy.

'Yes, all at once!'

Tourists in Egypt

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

'Hello Colin, I'm Arthur, any idea what all the fuss is about?'

"We've been wandering in the desert for forty years. But he's a man—would he ever ask directions?"

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

'Wow! It didn't take long to lose that new ark smell.'

"Life after death"

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

Souvenirs.

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

"Great - already running late and then this happens."

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

BIBLE STORIES, 'This is full of battle and other BOY stuff - not a single romantic comedy!'

Mummy Beggar

'Forget it lads. We've been refused planning permission for this one!'

"Having completed the formation of the earth, on the seventh day the Lord rested. Then, on the eighth day, the Lord said, 'Let there be problems.' And there were problems."

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

"Tut's outdone himself this time."

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

"Daniel, I seem to have dropped my keys, could you look around and toss them up."

Books of Tablets

Archimedes statue tipped up by a lever.

"Archaeologists discovered several enormous ancient cities buried under the jungles of Cambodia. That means the Khmer civilization was the largest empire on Earth from the 9th to the 12th centuries. That changes everything about our conception of the Middle Ages. What was your conception of the Middle Ages? Well... it was... well, knights, maidens, dragons... mostly dragons. And elves."

"Maybe all spirit filled meetings should be held outside to avoid setting off the sprinklers."

'I just glanced back at Sodom and Gomorrah for a second...'

'But everybody does that stuff!'

1880 Presidential Election - Columbia Consoles General Hancock after Election Defeat