Antique Explorer Gifts

1880 Presidential Election - Columbia Consoles General Hancock after Election Defeat

Ye Olde Curiosity Shoppe

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

The Vineyard

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

Ancient Racing

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Physician tending a mummy.

'It's an extinction notice.'

Tourists in Egypt

Those Were The Days

You had me at vintage.

"Life after death"

The Gladiator.

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

The Tutankhamen Expedition 1908 (The Economy Version).

Souvenirs.

"Sadie, I just heard they discovered lots of ancient cities buried hundreds of years ago in the jungles of Cambodia. They've each got weird geometric patterns outlining what may have been gardens. But no one really knows what they were used for. I guess what I'm asking you is... what were they used for? Y'know, since you were there to see them in their prime. They were used for ritual sacrifices of dullards. For educational purposes, I shall now perform one."

Pompeii restoration project.

'Forget it lads. We've been refused planning permission for this one!'

'Let me get this straight: you'll answer three questions, but only three questions? No kidding? Boy, is this my lucky day or what?'

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

Cavemen. Wheel being burnt with fire.

'I'm inventing the wheel, and I'd like you to be my SPOKESMAN.'

Mummy Tourists

Dept of Egyptology - Toot and Come In.

"Archaeologists discovered several enormous ancient cities buried under the jungles of Cambodia. That means the Khmer civilization was the largest empire on Earth from the 9th to the 12th centuries. That changes everything about our conception of the Middle Ages. What was your conception of the Middle Ages? Well... it was... well, knights, maidens, dragons... mostly dragons. And elves."

"Tut's outdone himself this time."

Archimedes statue tipped up by a lever.

"What was the Roman attitude to construction?"

"I have a bad feeling about this."

'Caution slippery pyramid' sign on ancient Egyptian pyramids.

'Sure I can put in a wet bar, too.'

'According to our research they were a happy people.'

"I can't for the life of me think of a caption for it. I guess I'll just leave it as it is."