Old School Cool Gifts

"When I was your age, I had to walk two blocks to the video rental store."

Early Adopter...Early Opt-Outer

Old rocker.

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

"I put my faith in coal. Because there’s no fuel like an old fuel."

"Everybody meets online these days."

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

'Do you know what I miss? - Chalk talks!'

"'CPD'...stuff and nonsense, the old ways are fine for me, now pass me a hammer. I need to put this patient out!"

Peace on Earth

"I'd like to make a return."

How can you read that comic strip Blondie? Its about a kinder, simpler time. It's about ancient history. They do the same material over and over. Exactly. I can count on it. Not like your stupid Pearls and Get fuzzy. Oooh, look how angry and edgy they are. They're sooo clever! Your whole gig is being angry and edgy. Look, I'm setting Candorville on fire.

"This is where I keep my entire music collection."

Rolling Stones

'It's like listening to the 1950s. You can hear the dentures whistling.'

'Grandpa says that, in his day, he had to walk 20 miles in the snow just to steal music.'

"He refuses to watch the NEWs - living as he does, in the past."

'Beat it! I've got a computer!'

'Don't touch him. He's grandfathered in.'

"Vinyl I get. This, I didn't see coming."

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

"Come on. I always browse the Mom and Pop stores before buying online."

Workers constructing barcodes

Church in the year 2035.

Keith Richards

Private Phone Calls

You've got mail...

"Gracie, I'm proud of you for reading the newspaper."

"I would rather you not email me your answer!"

'This doesn't leave much room for creativity.'

"I said: 'Can you turn the jukebox down, I can't hear myself drink!"

"When I was your age we didn't play video games or take photos or locate things - we just did one thing and we took our sweet time doing it."

Technophobes Illustrated Dictionary - Digitally Mixed - Any drink stirred without the use of a spoon, swizzle stick or any other tool/utensil.