Offshore Operator T-Shirts

'I notice you're claiming non-domicile status, Mr Bull...'

"I see the downsizing continues."

'Don't ask questions, Ralph, just tell me who you'd rather look like - Sean Connery or Robert Redford.'

"Oh...Hi Bob, listen buddy, I'm in a meeting right now, I'll Caw you back."

"I'll check and see if he's available."

"International trade"

"Please stay on the line – your caul is important to us."

"I'm away from my desk or on another line. Please leave a message at the sound of my impersonation of a beep."

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

Thermidor Dali

'Don't call us, we'll call you, inc,'

'You Americans call it 'Illegal Tax Evasion'? Well, here in Europe, we call it 'Monaco Effect Investments''!

"Take no notice, Blendie, it's just Brent, being his usual, crude..."

"This is a computer speaking. I will now misconnect you and your party."

'We're seeking a safe tax haven for our investments.'

Panama Papers Scandal

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

Cover story: Oil Workers Monthly.

'The tropical tax haven where he offshored his business was just hit by a tsunami.'

"If you're annoyed by answering machines, press 1. . ."

'Snack Bar's Open.'

'To be honest, I'm not sure if a HAZARD ASSESSMENT would have seen this one coming!'

'And remember: this isn't a submarine!'

'Never mind what I'm wearing!'

The Church-Going Bell.

"If you know what you want, please say so now, otherwise listen carefully, because the menu option have changed."

"Operator, I'd like to make a person-to-person call, and I'd like to reverse the roles."

'According to this load analysis, we're overweight by one hundred and fifty pounds. Any suggestions?'

Demand For Oil

Oil Workers

RSI

Admiral Nelson commanding a small car ferry