Office Ruler T-Shirts

'Big shots deserve big offices.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

I love my Timpani

'You're developing a reputation as something of a cowboy, Henderson.'

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

Malcolm Sargent

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

Do not think outside the box!

'Good new. . . we're moving you to a bigger desk!'

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

"It drives me mad when people act as though we had nothing to do except write moronic memorandum..."

'Sorry, you failed the aptitude test.' -'Thankfully I own the company.'

A politician's dream come true...

'The company was quite generous. They gave me a whole day off for the funeral.'

'Not my short list, O'Neil! You're on my other list!

"The figures for the last quarter are in. We made significant gains in the fifteen-to-twenty-six-year-old age group, but we lost our immortal souls."

"The holidays are finished George, get over it!"

'Interactive TV news.'

'Welcome to the office. . . Someone will be along to remove your self esteem and install your paranoia.'

'And I see that Derek continues to ignore our company's dress code...'

"King and clown—why can't I be both?"

I stamped out smiley faces in your handwritten memos, and by George, I'll do the same with emoticons in your emails!

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

"If I could quit tomorrow, I'd be gone yesterday."

"Why, this is fit for me!"

"I pride myself on being able to walk that fine line between misdemeanor and felony."

'We've got trouble, Henderson - Your people got with my people and decided they didn't need us.'

'You'll have more luck getting the sword out of the stone than getting the remote control out of his hand.'

"Yeah? Well, tell him that in this company Gandhi-like resistance wouldn't have worked for Gandhi, either."

"What're you doing? Your contract forbids you from watching 'cute baby video' on YouTube."