Office Olympian Gifts

Office Safety.

"Don't ask."

Online Sales Company. I'm excited about the company Olympics. I hear supervisors will be in the decathlon because they're used to multitasking. The people making express deliveries will be in the sprints. Of course the people who package orders will be boxing. What about tennis? Those are the folks who handle returns.

'Do you get the impression that Simpson isn't completely happy here!'

"ASAP!!!"

"You were employee of the month last month. What have you done lately?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

Overworked in the office

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

"We need to do something about excessive admin. I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

'I had a thought. Let's scrap everything and start a new fiscal year right now.'

Parade of Businessmen

Meat Grinder

Upward Progress

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

Lumbar support animal

Presentation: Thinking each other are idiots.

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

'How did the 'I want you all to take a pay cut or leave' strategy go down?'

'All right! Who put my dozing-off during our last meeting on youtube?'

'I can't give you a raise, a promotion or a bigger office, but I AM going to allow you to have a personality.'

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

The vice-president in charge of sincerity

"Fine - you don't want to run in the corporate 5K - I get it. What about the corporate cage fighting team?"

'Would you all please congatulate...'

"What's the problem? We told you when you started you'd have to make some sacrifices."

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."

'Yes, we do have an incentive scheme.We call it 'continued employment'.'