Office Comic Relief Lover Pillows

"You're probably wondering why I called you. It's because I accidentally butt dialed you."

You Are Here

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

"Touché"

Though Mr. Frackman had yet to say a word, Bill sensed he was about to receive a particularly lousy performance review.

'Tommy is in the other room playing with the triangle we bought him in Bermuda.'

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"Barlow, it's come to my attention that you've called in, 'Playing Possum' 8 days this month."

The First Printed Bible

"First, we'll look for repressed memories of malpractice suits."

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

'No no!! Not that one... The BIG one on the top shelf!!'

My therapist cured me of using humour as a defense...these days I pack a .45.

'Sleep on your face again, Phil?'

"The only reason I'm firing you for your suggestion is because you signed yours."

Comedian faces audience of clowns: 'Ooh, tough crowd.'

'You've come a long way with your anger this year. In fact, I feel that you are ready to meet a special friend of mine...'

"The good news is it's brightening up..."

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

'I think I have aixelsyd.'

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

'We want you to start working from home. And not for us.'

"Well... that rhino horn's doing absolutely nothing for me..."

Exposed and imprisoned.

"I've changed my mind"

When clowns run out ammunition.

"I don't want to alarm you, but it seems that what you have on your back may actually be my backpack."