Office Chatter Advocate Gifts

Now see, we couldn't have this kind of fun, if we met online.

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

Trays on desk read, 'Here', 'There' and, 'Neither here nor there.'

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

'I hate bloody football! It's just a bunch of over-rated, overpaid nancy boys kicking a b-' - 'Genuine football fans may leave work early to avoid missing the start of important World Cup fixtures.' - 'C'mon England!'

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

"I hear you may do a baby."

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

"Every day is Monday." "Except Friday."

'If executive bonuses are outlawed, only outlaws will have bonuses.'

'It's signed by the entire office. You're not too popular areound here, are you?'

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

"Come to my office. I need to cascade with you offline."

'Your advert didn't say anything about intelligence... it said you wanted a manager!'

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'

"I had considered hyphenating my last name, but now I'm leaning towards and underscore."

Corp H.Q. In the corporate world, do you it's what you know or who you know? Neither, it's what you know about who.

"Got your e-mail and the answer is yes, I can pass you the stapler."

Pig and chicken asking for milk from cow, who replies: 'Sorry, I already gave at the office.'

"Until we get more employees to join, we'll just have to roll with the paunches."

"Have you heard of Murphy's Law 2.0? It's anything that could possibly go wrong often does...as well as a thing or two that couldn't possibly go wrong."

"Thanks for your offer, but in our company we still have a perfect information and communication system. It's called water cooler talk."

'Staff Recommendations Inc.'

'Cold hard facts are good, but to complete the picture, here's Brenda from the mailroom with some hot, juicy gossip.'

'Have a great day, but not at my expense.'

'I want you guys to be aware that a dog-eat-dog environment works for me.'

'Why do you want a career in the bank?'

'Seems like everyday is bring your work to work day.'

' And just when you thought it couldn't get any worse...'

"I hope your day is going bad."

Isn't that a surveillance camera?