Off-season Hibernator Gifts

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

Welcome Spring.

A guide to seasons in the North East

'I'll set snooze for an extra month.'

'I seem to be trading hibernation for urination.'

'Think we should be packing up soon, Hon?'

"Me, I'm lazy, so I wouldn't seek an endless summer, but an endless winter. I so wish I could migrate to hibernate twice a year..."

"I don't care if we did hibernate all Winter, I'm still tired."

"Shoot, I forgot this place has early checkout."

"I'm sorry, sir, but Professor Dornley does not wish to be distracted for the duration of the winter."

"Hibernating! C'mon guys, I was only hibernating."

The Off-Season

'Your snoring kept me awake all through December!'

'Get the 'extra hold' bear spray. I want to look good when we come out of hibernation.'

"It's half past November, young man! Get back in your room and hibernate!"

"Jeez, Honey, will you hurry up in there? I've been hibernating all winter, too, y'know!"

'Hefner is thinking about the off season already.'

"Can you believe it? A couple of page-turners, one affair, and, wham - it's Labor Day."

'Quick, shut the door! The flu!'

"Did you know that someday astronauts may put themselves into deep hibernation to artificially shorten the grueling journey to their ultimate destination? Wake me up on Christmas morning."

"If you hibernated you wouldn't have to worry about losing an hour's sleep to daylight savings."

After 5 months in hibernation, Clyde needed a real 'pick-me up'.

'Post-Hibernation Blues'

"Hibernation is great son! We sleep through the dreary winters and wake up in the glorious springs!"

"It is too early to be hungry. Go to sleep and don't wake me up, at least until march."

"I always feel sorry for the kids who have birthdays during hibernation."

Annual pursuit of free agents in the off-season.

The first day of spring has finally arrived! The only think I'll miss about winter is curling up under a warm blanket straight out of the dryer on a frigid night.

'I'm being tested for sleep apnoea this winter: Better go, see you in spring...'

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

'How would you like to try sleeping, when somebody's lying next to you snoring for six months?'

'The long winters really have an effect on Greg's mood.'

'I would love to learn to ski too, but when there's snow around, I'm usually asleep...'

'I woke up early from hibernation, so I watched TV for two weeks until my parents got up...'

Groundhog Day