Oceanic Escapist Gifts

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

"Well, if you don’t want to discuss exposure, drowning or sharks, what do you want to talk about?"

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

'No swimming. No breathing.'

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Captain in a storm

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

Thinks he's too cool for school.

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"Scuba cow"

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"If you hold a shell to your ear you can hear the ocean..."

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

'Another one? Do you realize it will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

"Now you can send it."

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

'...I said we've been marooned.'

Remote controlled car on a boat.

Saved...life is good!

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

Waiting for a turn to swim.

Where cartoon characters go on holiday...

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

"Why don't you just go and see this summer's feel-good movie?"

Lifesaver!

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

A man plays golf by the sea