Nursery Crimes Analyst Gifts

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

Batman at the Maternity Ward

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

A Communal Breakfast for the Young

Coping with a strong-willed child

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

A Preschool of Fish

'Don't let them know you're a prodigy. If they find out, they'll take away your teddy bear.'

His first conspiracy theory...'Is it a coincidence the first time I walk, they start locking all the cupboards? I think not!'

Children's Nursery

'I need affordable daycare now!'

"Oh he also likes Wagner's 'Flight Of The Valkyries' played whenever he enters a room."

'I didn't get the Owners Manual. I thought you got the Owners Manual.'

"I realise that it shows a lack of maturity .. But I like baby talk."

"I don't see how pulling out a piece of fruit from a pie necessarily validates Jack Horner's self-worth."

Child climbs up alphabet bricks to reach his teddy bear.

"My special power is supervision."

Medellin erases the image of Escobar

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

Fashion Nursery School

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

'So far we don't have any suspects.'

'Well if you wanted a garden shed made out of wood or brick, then you should have married one of my brothers!'

Clown baby.

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

Gangster Babies

Fox Hunting

Early Learning Centre

'No offence. The other breast and I seemed to click.'

"Ah ha! Organised criminals..."

Pre-School Child Center - Computer LiterateNon-Computer Literate.

'All those years of teaching me to walk and talk. . . now all they want is for me to sit down and shut up!'

Cr�che Seige