Nuptial Novice Gifts

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

Today we learned to count to one.

Babies vs. Dogs

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

This is forever... till death do us part...

'Do you Duane, paternity suit notwithstanding, take Diane...'

"I don't remember him or the meal or what movie we saw. All I remember is I wore the right jeans."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

"Admit it, you're lost!"

"Triple whammy."

"You may now begin venting about each other's wedding-prep behavior."

'You may well, Ms. Ferris, one day write a 'Fifty Shades of Grey' bonkbuster, but today your account is one shade of red.'

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

'Nobody really agrees about what marriage is these days, so I'll just say 'Yadda yadda yadda.''

Vicar tells bride, 'We can't go on meeting like this'.

The wedding.

I really hope the agent likes my submission... - '' - 'This is perfect.' - '' - 'Absolutley perfect.'

"I've discovered I don't have a head for figures."

"Of course he's not our son. You wanted me to change the baby, didn't you?"

"First date. You'd think she would have done something about her eraser."

'I do. Just don't let it go to your head.'

If I learn how to write Roman Numerals, will that help me write computer code?

Always a pleasure to supply your wedding cakes, Mabel, the usual is it?

"If you have a boyfriend, I have some advice, young lady! Wisdom that's been handed down from generation to generation!"

Tom Prepares for his Hot Date.

'My lab partner wants a prenuptial agreement!'

"Yes, but it's naturally toxic."

Next time, bring a map.

"Thanks but, 'you'll do' isn't a ringing endorsement of officiating your wedding."

'Is it mine yet?'

"Hello, Linda — long time, no see."